Christmas 2009 Looking On to 2010

What an amazing Christmas 2009 turned out to be! Kayla received tons of presents! We hosted our family holiday party, like we do every year, and opened presents as a family of 3 Christmas morning. (Grandma Tosto joined us too) Then we went over to Papa Tosto and Grandma Tosto's house where Baby K was spoiled even more by Santa!

My favorite part of Christmas has always been watching others open up their presents. Sure it is nice getting presents yourself but watching their faces light up when they get that gift they have been wanting-that is what makes the holiday for me.

2010 is just around the corner. It's hard to believe what a 180 life has been for us this past year. I can't wait to see what wonderful things 2010 brings. One this is for sure, I will never forget this Christmas. It was by far the best Christmas ever. Becoming a mom is the greatest gift I was given this year!

Happy New Year to All!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from The Watson's!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

It's Official!

It's Official! She's ours!! Tuesday, November 3rd, Kayla's adoption became finalized.
We had a ton of family show up for our hearing and we celebrated Kayla's big day by hanging out with her grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins at the state fair. She had a blast!

It's amazing the day has finally come. I guess after everything we have been through with the pregnancy losses I was always waiting for the bottom to fall out from underneath us but I now know that this was meant to be! Adoption has been such a wonderful blessing in our lives. Kayla is truly an amazing little girl and she brings so much joy to our lives.



At the petting zoo at the state fairFun in the photo booth at the AZ State Fair


Thank you to everyone who has supported us along the way. We couldn't have done it without you!

Baby K's first Halloween and TV Appearance!

BABY K 'S FIRST HALLOWEEN!

This is the first Halloween I have enjoyed in years! In 2007 I missed out on Halloween because I was having surgery due to my 3rd pregnancy loss. 2008 I had just lost my job right when we we were about to sign on with Lifetime to start the adoption process so we weren't in the hoiliday spirit that year either. What a 180 from the past 2 years!

This Halloween weekend started out with Baby K and her cousin Carter on the Fox 10 AZ Morning Show. This is the station where my husband and I met 7 1/2 years ago! It felt so good to walk into that studio where it all began and bring our daughter in to meet everyone. Her and Carter hammed it up for the camera naturally! See video below!

Baby K and her cousin Carter on Fox 10 AZ Morning 10-30-09

Halloween Day started out with Baby K and I doing the JDRF Walk. (she was a pumpkin) This was her 2nd fundraiser walk and she had a blast walking to cure diabetes. We walked as part of Jack's Pack Team! http://www.jacks-pack.blogspot.com/

Halloween Night our little pumpkin turned into Tinkerbell and joined her cousins for a night of Trick-or-Treating. Bryce, Aunt Rhea, Baby K, Mommy, Aunt Courtney, and Carter

Baby K, Carter, and Bryce

Baby K and cousin Bryce

-

Motherhood

MOTHERHOOD

Someone asked me today how I like being a mom. Answering that question was easy...

I LOVE IT!!

Motherhood is exactly what I dreamed it would be and so much more. It's a tough job but so worth it and I wouldn't change one second. Even during those crazy mornings when my head just wants to hit the pillow and get another 40 winks I know I have a little baby in the nursery waiting for me to get her up to start her day. It's amazing. I never thought I would finally be here.



Me and Baby K after the Race for the Cure walk 10-11-09
Lunch Time!

Family Picture Time!

FAMILY PICTURE TIME!

We spent our Labor Day weekend hanging out with family and friends and taking our first family pictures! It's hard to believe Kayla will be 5 months old this Saturday. How time flies by!


Baby K and me!

The Watson's in color

Life with our Baby Girl at 4 months old!

Our daughter Kayla is 4 months old!

It's hard to believe Kayla is already 4 months old. They weren't kidding when they say kids grow up fast! She is so much fun. Rolling over constantly and what a personality she is developing. We love hearing her laugh and coo. Parenthood is truly amazing. I haven't been this happy since my wedding day. Yes- sleep is minimal but it is so over-rated! ha ha

Mommy and Kayla

Daddy and his Little Girl!



Kayla playing in her Bumbo with her book:

Kayla Cooing:

Kayla's Measurements: 15 pounds 2 oz 26 inches long

Enjoying Parenthood!

Parenthood truly is such a rewarding experience. We are enjoying every moment with Kayla. It is so much fun to watch her reach each milestone. Last night she rolled over and back and the best part? We got it on video!! (WARNING! Very annoying mommy in the background. I recommend muting before playing. I got a little excited. ha ha ha)

This past weekend we also had Kayla's Meet the Baby Shower. What a wonderful time it was. For so many years I have wanted to have a baby shower and finally I was able to have one! It was amazing to see how many people came and all of the presents baby Kayla received. This little girl has more clothes than mommy now I think. LOL

TO MY BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL KAYLA

TO MY BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL KAYLA

Starlight Starbright

by: Nicolette Larson

Never thought that in a million years

Never thought that you would come to me

You're the answers to a million prayers.

You're the apple of my eye.

Ican hear you breathing next to me.

Just how lucky can one person be?

I am looking at a mystery

Everything i dream, more than i can wish for.

Starlight Starbright,

All day all night I will be right next to you.

Here forever, I will never leave, I will never leave.

Baby you're my little ray of light

I could find you in the darkest nights

If you cry then i will hold you tight

Never letting go,

I would do that for you.

Starlight Starbright,

All day all night I will be right next to you.

Here forever, I will never leave, I will never leave.

Baby I am here baby I am here

Starlight Starbright,

All day all night I will be right next to you.

Here forever,

I will never leave, I will never leave.

Welcome To The World
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnPtTOX6DLo

Newly Adopted Exclusive on the Lifetime Website!

Newly Adopted Exclusive on the Lifetime Website

Here is the link below:



http://www.lifetimeadoption.com/newlyadopted.html

This was posted on the Lifetime Adoptions website today!

This was just posted on Lifetime Adoptions website today :) We will also appear onthe Newly Adopted Page as well.

Kayla's Homecoming- July 9th 2009

Kayla's Homecoming- July 9th 2009

We finally had clearance on Thursday July 9th to take Kayla back with us to AZ. Since we crossed state lines and she was born in Nevada the Interstate Compact just had to make sure all of the appropriate documents were signed before we could head home with our new daughter.

What a homecoming Kayla received! Our house was decorated inside and out and filled with presents from her cousins Carter & Bryce, Aunts, Uncles, Grandmas & Grandpa, and Great Grandma. We were so excited. The whole family came over to welcome Kayla to the family.

Grandma Mo & Kayla

Papa Tosto and Grandma Tosto with Kayla

Aunt Courtney and Uncle Weldon

Aunt Courtney & cousin Carter, Aunt Rhea & cousin Bryce, Me & Baby Kayla Great Grandma Davis, Grandma Mo, Kayla, Carter, Weston and me

Dreams Do Come True & Prayers Are Answered!

WE ARE PARENTS!!!! I think I am still in shock!!

Sorry it has taken me so long to write. I am still adjusting to motherhood and Kayla is having tons of visitors every day.

Here is our Adoption Story:
We received a call from Lifetime Adoptions on June 24th that a birthmother had reviewed 9 profiles and wanted only us for her 2 1/2 month old baby girl Sophia. We were elated! We didn't have to wait for her to decide between 2 or 3 families. She only wanted us which was amazing!

Thursday June 25th the birthmother and I talked and we reported back to Lifetime that we both wanted to move forward. We had arranged for her to call back at 5:30pm so she could talk to my husband. I had forwarded our adoption 800# to my phone and headed down to my husband's office since he was working late and we waited and waited. No call :( We were heartbroken. The agency kept calling her and there was no response. We were sure she had changed her mind. So many emotions went through my head. "Did I say something wrong on the phone call?" I kept going over the conversation in my head and couldn't find anything I might have said to offend her. We decided to go get some dinner that night and I was so distraught, How could I be going through another type of loss again? This just wasn't fair. We were so close. Then little signs kept coming around me. I was walking around the shops near my husband's office and looked through the window of a souvenir shop. There they had personalized AZ license plates with names on it. There was a man looking at them and when he turned the spinning display the name Sophia faced directly toward me. Was this God's way of telling me this was going to work out? I'll admit, there was a little glimmer of hope still there in my heart but I have had that hope before and had my heart broken with my previous pregnancy losses so I tried not to look to much into it.

As everyone knows, June 25th was the day Michael Jackson died so there was a ton of coverage all over the television. I was at home watching a report on his death when they showed a girl dancing like Michael in front of the Apollo Theater. The announcer said, "and that was Sophie dancing like Michael Jackson." I immediately looked up and thought, "hmm that was weird."

I am a big believer that things happen in 3's so I thought, Okay- that is 2, am I going to get one more sign?" Then a Gerber baby commercial came on. It was a stretch but I counted it as sign #3 anyways.

Friday passed- still no word. Saturday passed- still no word. I was such an emotional wreck. The only thing that made me feel better was babysitting my almost 1 year old nephew. It's so weird but he is my saving grace. Whenever I am down I can just be around him and he lifts my spirits.

Sunday my husband took me to see a funny movie to get my mind off of things. It definitely helped brighten my mood. Then, it happened. SHE CALLED!! She apologized and said she had left for a trip to see her sister and forgotten her phone and that she hadn't changed her mind. She still wanted to move forward. We couldn't believe it.

That whole next week I was on the phone with attorneys and social workers. We found out Wed July 1st that the adoption would take place on July 6th and that we had to fly to Reno. We immediately bought our plane tickets and booked our hotel room. Needless to say I did not sleep well at all that week. I was excited, scared, anxious. I just wanted to go and pick up our baby at that moment.

Friday we went to Target and bought the car seat and stroller. I was so nervous. I felt like we shouldn't be there buying these things yet but my husband wanted to get the basic essentials we needed before we got to Reno so we wouldn't be rushing around.

Saturday was July 4th. I wanted to tell everyone so badly but we knew we had to wait until it was final. It’s kind of like when you are pregnant and don’t tell anyone until the 2nd trimester. You don’t want to announce it too early in case it doesn’t work out.

Sunday we hopped on a plane to Reno. The birthmother text me and told me she didn’t have a ride so we offered to pick her and the baby up for the Monday morning appointment., I was happy about this because one of my biggest fears was that she wouldn’t show up to the signing. Now we were picking her up so that wouldn’t be an issues.

That night my husband and I didn’t sleep. We were so filled with anxiety and anxious about the events that were to happen Monday morning.

The next morning we picked up the birthmother and the baby and I immediately fell in love. That little girl was so amazingly beautiful. We went to the social worker’s office and the signing began. Once all was said and done the time came for our birthmother to say goodbye to the baby. I think that was the hardest thing I have ever had to see. What a brave woman she is. I admire her strength and her trust in Weston and I to raise her birth daughter. She kept telling us she knew she was doing the right thing and that we could give her baby the kind of life she wouldn’t be able to provide for her. I asked her if she would like some time alone with the baby before we left and she said no. We dropped her off at her sister’s apartment. The 3 of us just hugged and tightly and said our goodbyes.

Dreams Do Come True & Prayers Are Answered. I love this little girl as if I carried her for 9 months. Our love for Kayla is more than we could have ever imagined and we feel so blessed and lucky to have her in our lives. Of course hindsight is 20/20 but it is amazing when you look back at your journey and realize why certain things happened the way they did. Losing my job back in October happened for a reason. We were supposed to meet this little girl at the exact time we did. It was all part of a big plan that we had no control over.

Today I look at Kayla in awe. I can't believe after 3 1/2 years and 5 pregnancy losses I am finally a mommy! My husband is finally a daddy, my parents are finally grandparents, my brother is finally an uncle. This is what I have prayed for every night and the time is finally here!

For anyone out there struggling with attaining a dream my advice to you is to keep pushing forward. Randy Pausch said it perfectly. “Brick walls are there for a reason. They help us prove how badly we want something.” My husband and I sure faced a lot of brick walls but we made it!


"Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone.

But, still miraculously, my own.

Never forget, for a single minute

You didn't grow under my heart, but in it."

-UNKNOWN

Our Beautiful Daughter Kayla Sophia!

It's The Simple Things That Matter

Two Fridays ago my hubby and I were at Petco and adopted a water turtle named Crush for only $5. (my best friend Rhea helped me with the name since it was the name of the turtle in Finding Nemo) We kind of started laughing when they asked us if we were ready to sign the adoption papers. Oh how they have no idea how ready we are but for now we looked at this as "practice" for the real thing!

My favorite part about adopting this turtle was when our friends brought their little boy over to see him. The excitement on his face and the laugh he made when the turtle dove into the water just made us smile. After they left my husband said "seeing Bryce's reaction to the turtle was well worth the $5!" I realized then what a great father Weston is going to make. (not that I didn't already know but this confirmed it that much more) It's the little things that excite us when we are around our friends kids. We don't have to spend tons of money or show off. It is amazing how a $5 swimming turtle can brighten up your day when you you get to share it with a little kid who thinks it is the coolest thing he has ever seen. I can't wait for the day when we get to see our own child's smiling face when we show him or her the simple wonderful things life has to offer.

The Mayonnaise Jar and the Beer

We are still waiting to be matched but we have opened our preferences more to include all Hispanic (along with our other preferences) so I am hoping this will allow more birth moms to view our profile and possibly be chosen sooner. It's only been about 2 months but of course I am still antsy. I am so eager to go out there and buy all of those fun baby things. Everytime I go to the store I have to resist the urge to buy something baby. LOL


A co-worker of mine sent this to me this past Monday and I thought I would share it with all of you: (I'm sure a lot of you have read this one but I still love it each time I read it)


When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours
in a day are not enough, remember:


The Mayonnaise Jar and the 2 Beers

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in
front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty
mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar He shook the jar lightly.

The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full.

The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured
the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space
between the sand.

The students laughed..

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things---your family, your
children,your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if
everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still
be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job,
your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no
room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will
never > have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children.

Spend time with your parents.

Visit with grandparents.

Take time to get medical checkups.

Take your spouse out to dinner..

Play another 18.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter.

Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer
represented.

The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.

Please share this with someone you care about. I JUST DID!

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS...

...IT'S LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN !



LETS ALL DANCE IN THE RAIN SHALL WE?

These Things Will Change

I saw my 10 month old nephew yesterday and he was so cute. He wouldn't let me leave the house when it was time to go. He kept hanging on to my shirt everytime I tried to hand him over to someone else. It made me feel really loved.

Today we should be celebrating our son's 1st birthday so I am feeling kind of sad.
I miss him so much but I am looking forward to the future.

Last night my mom and I went to the Taylor Swift concert and it was so much fun! I felt like a little girl again. I love her song Change. It reminds me not to give up and that things will change and I won't be childless forever. It was so inspiring to hear her sing it live last night.




Here are the lyrics:

CHANGE
By Taylor Swift

It's a sad picture;
The final blow hits you
Somebody else gets what you wanted again,
You know it's all the same,
Another time and place,
Repeating history and you're getting sick of it
But I believe in whatever you do,
And I'll do anything to see it through...
Chorus:
Because these things will change,
Can you feel it now?
These walls that they put up to hold us back
will fall down,
It's a revolution,
The time will come for us to finally win,
And we'll sing
Hallelujah
We'll sing
Hallelujah
Oh
So we've been outnumbered,
Threatened and now cornered,
It's hard to fight when the fight ain't fair,
We're getting stronger now,
find things they never found,
They might be bigger,
but we're faster and never scared.
You can walk away say "We don't need this"
But there's something in your eyes
says "We can beat this"
Chorus:
Because these things will change,
Can you feel it now?
These walls that they put up to hold us back will fall down,
It's a revolution,
The time will come for us to finally win,
And we'll sing
Hallelujah
We'll sing
Hallelujah
Oh

Tonight we'll stand,
Get off our knees,
Fight for what we've worked for all these years,
and the battle was long,
It's the fight of our lives,
When we stand up,
Champions tonight
It was the night things changed,
Can you see it now?
These walls that they put up to hold us back...fell down,
It's a revolution,
Throw your hands up,
'cause we never gave in,
And we'll sing
Hallelujah
We sang
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Yeah

Have a great and safe weekend everyone!

The Wait Really Is the Hardest Part

Wow-They weren't kidding when they said the wait is the hardest part. It's only been about a month in a 1/2 since we went active with Lifetime Adoptions and I am already getting antsy. I bring my phone everywhere in case they call. Everyday I pray they call but they don't. Today I find myself feeling very sad and wondering if I will ever be a mother. I didn't sleep very well last night and woke up and had a good cry after breakfast. Everyday I see others around me having babies and it makes me sad. Of course I am happy for everyone else but I want to experience the wonderful joys everyone else is posting about on their facebook or myspace pages and experience motherhood first hand. I have never wanted something so badly in my life.

I'm tired of taking things one step at a time. I'm tired of waiting. I'm just plan tired. Each month I still have that little hope inside me that I will be pregnant and that the next one will stick but this morning I realized I am so tired of all the worry. I am so ready to adopt a baby and really start my family with my husband. Today I just feel so broken. I know it is normal to have days like this and these feelings will too pass but I am just so ready.

Maybe I am feeling extra down because this Friday I should be celebrating our little boy's first birthday on May 22nd. He is the only baby we acutally saw a heartbeat with and then 3 weeks later he was gone. I still think about that day. The day I had to call my husband and tell him I lost yet another baby of ours. We were so close that time it still hurts to not know why we lost him.

I know I have to keep looking forward and not looking back at the past but it is just so hard sometimes. I look forward to the day we get that call from Lifetime and get to talk to our birth mother. I look forward to the day I get to finally bring my baby home and show him or her to the world. I look forward to making my parents grandparents and my brother an uncle finally. I look forward to the day I get to make my husband a father. I look forward to the day I am finally a mother.

Mother's Day While Waiting to Adopt

Here it is, once again, Mother's Day. Each year around this time I find myself praying that I will be a mother to a living child one year from now and each year it is the same thing. Another pregnancy loss or 2 and another holiday where I watch all of my friends who are mothers get recognition as I sit by wishing and hoping and praying that someday I will get to celebrate this wonderful day not just as a daughter but as a mother myself. This year to date I have 5 angels in heaven that will celebrate Mother's Day with me in my heart.

It was so nice to check my email today and receive a Mother's Day e-card from my Adoption Coordinator Dee over at Lifetime. I think this is the first Mother's Day card I have ever gotten!

I am really impressed with the amount of attention Lifetime Adoptions gives its families waiting to be matched. Every month they have a teleconference where a recent adoptive mother shares her story. This past week the call was amazing. I was literally crying tears of happiness for the new mom who was on the phone. I can't wait for the day when I get to tell my story.

Below is also a message and a video from the founder of Lifetime (an adoptive mother herself) Mardie Caldwell:

"Mother's Day while waiting to adopt can be difficult. But it can also be a day to reflect upon your blessings and strengthen your resolve that you WILL become parents through adoption if you do not give up. We are praying for you today and every day!"




HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to everyone out there!

Check out our adoption website and forward on to your family and friends!

http://www.lifetimeadoption.com/for_birtmothers/families/weston_lisa/index.html

"Officially Waiting"

Now we are officially in the "waiting" period. This is the hard part where we just have to wait to be matched. They said the average time is between 3 months to a year to get matched with a birth mom. It's only been a couple of weeks and I am already getting antsy!! LOL I have never been one to be patient though so I guess this is good training for when the little one finally does get here.

A friend of mine just sent me this a few days ago and it really spoke to me. (especially with Mother's Day coming up) That is a hard holiday for me since I don't get acknowledged as a mother because I don't have a living child here on earth. Anyway- here is what she sent me:


I WILL BE...
There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought,
without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children,
I know that I will be a great mom. I will be a great mom not because of genetics,
or money or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child. I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again.

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. I will notice everything about my child. I will take time to watch my child sleep,explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child,
knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me.

I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to,
I will not be careless with my love. I will be a better mother for all that I have endured.

I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbour, friend and sister because I have known pain. I know disillusionment as my own body has betrayed me.
I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.
I have prevailed. I have succeeded. I have won. So now, when others hurt around me,
I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs. I listen. And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.

I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.

And yes I will be a wonderful mother.

Good video message from Mardie Caldwell, CEO of LIfetime Adoption, about "Waiting"

Profile Books Completed and Shipped!!

I am so happy and relieved that we finally got our profile adoption books bound and sent off to the agency!!

Yesterday I was a total stress case because the printed pages were coming from the printer via UPS from Florida and were scheduled to arrive Monday April 20th. I had arranged for everyone to come over that evening so we could get to work right away. I had intended on having everything set up and ready to go but it didn't happen that way exactly. I anxiously waited all day for them to get to the house constantly looking out the window to see if that big brown truck was coming around the corner. 5pm hit, then 6pm hit. Still no package. I had Weston's mom, his aunt, and his cousin at the house waiting to help me get these books together and the truck still hadn't showed up with my package. I called UPS 3 times to make sure that the package was still set to arrive that day and they assured me that the driver should be there any minute. Weston's brother, his wife and their little 9 month old showed up to help as well around 7pm. There I was, with a house full of people to help me put these books together and no books! The UPS truck FINALLY got there at 7:20pm. Of course we were his last stop.

Pictured: Aunt Ro, Rhea, Courtney, and Me working on the books)
We diligently got to work and started doing the hole punches, threading the ribbons, adding the charms, tying the bows, taping the DVDs in, and the picture on front. I am so grateful for everyone that showed up as I could not have gotten these done with out them. After everyone left Weston and I went through them and had to sign each one.

My sister-in-law Courtney putting together a profile book

All boxed up, signed, and ready to go I finally dropped them off at UPS this morning. I can't explain to you the relief I felt walking out of that UPS store. The books are scheduled to get to the agency Thursday before noon and then they can start sending them out to birth moms to view us as a possible family for their child.

NOW THE REAL WAITING BEGINS!!