"Officially Waiting"

Now we are officially in the "waiting" period. This is the hard part where we just have to wait to be matched. They said the average time is between 3 months to a year to get matched with a birth mom. It's only been a couple of weeks and I am already getting antsy!! LOL I have never been one to be patient though so I guess this is good training for when the little one finally does get here.

A friend of mine just sent me this a few days ago and it really spoke to me. (especially with Mother's Day coming up) That is a hard holiday for me since I don't get acknowledged as a mother because I don't have a living child here on earth. Anyway- here is what she sent me:


I WILL BE...
There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought,
without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children,
I know that I will be a great mom. I will be a great mom not because of genetics,
or money or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child. I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again.

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. I will notice everything about my child. I will take time to watch my child sleep,explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child,
knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me.

I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to,
I will not be careless with my love. I will be a better mother for all that I have endured.

I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbour, friend and sister because I have known pain. I know disillusionment as my own body has betrayed me.
I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.
I have prevailed. I have succeeded. I have won. So now, when others hurt around me,
I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs. I listen. And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.

I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.

And yes I will be a wonderful mother.

Good video message from Mardie Caldwell, CEO of LIfetime Adoption, about "Waiting"