Today I talked to our agency and we should hear back regarding what changes we need to make to our profile book hopefully tomorrow. Once we get those changes we will send the final off to the printer to make the 50 books which will be mailed off to birth moms to learn more about us. I've been feeling really antsy lately. I just want to get this going and go active on the website and have birth moms start viewing us and hopefully get chosen soon.
Today my dad had surgery and while I was at the hospital 4 times I heard the lullaby that indicated a baby was born. It made me wish I was at the hospital for that same reason. When I arrived to the hospital this morning I was to meet my mom on the 2nd floor. Once I got off the elevator I had two options. Go right to the the OB birthing unit or go left to the surgery waiting room. I was so tempted to go to the right and see if I could view any new moms rocking their newborn babies but I resisted. As I made my way left to the waiting room I passed by the OB Birthing classroom. I'll admit it, when I went to the same hospital in 2005 for my mom's surgery I really thought the next time I would be there would be because I was giving birth. That is always the hospital I have dreamed of having my baby at. I pass by it every time I go to my parent's house.
Some days I think I am resolved to the fact that I may never give birth and some days it is that much harder to deal with that reality. I guess I just feel blessed and lucky enough to know what it is like to get a positive on that pregnancy test or to see a baby with a heartbeat on that monitor. I know some women don't even get those little joys and I did and for that I am forever grateful.
I am so excited to adopt and I know that this is the path Weston and I were supposed to take all along. We will love the baby we adopt so much and I know we will not be able to comprehend how our lives would be different without him or her once they arrive. I used to believe that to be a mom I would have to give birth myself but now I see that is not the case and I know that will become more obvious when I am finally holding that precious baby in my arms.
Who knows what the journey ahead holds for us. Maybe we will adopt more than one, maybe we won't. I am just so excited for the day when we finally get to bring our own little miracle home and show him or her off to the world. Praying that is sooner rather than later. If all goes well we should be active with the adoption agency by next week!!
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
We are Certified!!
Finally! I got the call today from my social worker that we are finally certified to adopt in the state of AZ. Although this is a little step it is a step in the right direction. Even though I had been told time and time again that there is no way we wouldn't be certified there was still a part of me that worried. I always tell my friends, if I could get paid to worry I would be a millionaire because that is what I do best. Worry. It should be my middle name.
So what's next you may ask? Well, now we can begin contacting attorneys. Now we can go active with our agency once we make our final payment. Now we can begin moving forward and I don't have to feel like we are just sitting around "waiting" anymore to get things started. Hopefully by April we will be active and will start being viewed by birth moms.
Just waiting for the input regarding our profile book and what changes need to be made. So we are moving in the right direction which makes me happy.
So what's next you may ask? Well, now we can begin contacting attorneys. Now we can go active with our agency once we make our final payment. Now we can begin moving forward and I don't have to feel like we are just sitting around "waiting" anymore to get things started. Hopefully by April we will be active and will start being viewed by birth moms.
Just waiting for the input regarding our profile book and what changes need to be made. So we are moving in the right direction which makes me happy.
Monday, March 23, 2009
One Tiny Step Closer
Today I received word from Heidi, the website coordinator over at Lifetime Adoptions. She said they received the materials I sent out Thursday and are now building our website with the pictures I enclosed. We are now waiting approval of our profile book so we can make the needed changes and then make the 50 copies which the agency will then send out to birth moms to view once we are active. So, now there is more waiting to be had but at least they have our materials and we are one step closer to being active.
Lifetime Adoption Center
Last year, after my 3rd pregnancy loss, I did a lot of research on various agencies and on adoption as a whole. We looked at going through a private attorney and talked to a few. Weston had called an attorney that many people had recommended and she was very rude to him when he called with questions. It was so disappointing because we were so eager to talk to her and learn more but after her practically biting Weston's head off and telling him since we weren't certified yet she didn't really have time to answer his questions we were completely turned off.
I researched and talked to a lot of agencies but I kept coming back to Lifetime Adoptions. There was just something about them that kept me going back. We were all ready to sign on with them in October of 2008 when I was laid off from my job. Even though I called them back, after receiving the contract, they allowed us to stay on the list of prospective families and continued to remain in contact with me all through my job search. They were so supportive and we weren't even officially a Lifetime family yet. After my 4th pregnancy loss the week of Christmas 2008 I knew in my heart that we were meant to adopt. It really made me realize that adoption is such an amazing miracle and I can't wait for the day when we finally get word that our little miracle is here. In the mean time, I guess we just have to...... you guessed it.... continue to wait.
Waiting for Certification
Well- It's been a little over a month since our home study report was sent in by our social worker and we still haven't heard back yet from the state. I am really starting to get antsy but my social worker assures me that this is completely normal. When I called a couple of weeks ago she said that she had just received 2 other family's certification that she had submitted 2 weeks prior to ours. I'm a praying that we get the paperwork this week along with our tax return. Once we have both of those we can proceed with our agency and hopefully go active very soon so we can start being viewed by birth moms.
Here is what we had to do for the home study:
HOME STUDY
First, we had to be finger printed to make sure neither of us have criminal records. (which we don't' of course :) ) Then we had to fill out a huge packet full of info regarding our financial stability, our family members, their addresses, our daily routines, our employers etc. We also had to get medical clearance from our general Dr. stating that we were healthy enough to care for a child. Talk about feeling like you are being put under a microscope to see whether you are good enough to be a parent.
Once that was completed we had to ask 3 family members and 3 friends to write recommendations on our behalf. We had all of that turned in and were ready to go with the actual home visit when I lost my job due to being laid off in October. Talk about bad timing :( So everything had to be put on hold until January when I had a new job and was able to reschedule the visit.
THE HOUSE VISIT:
Our social worker came to the house and sat down with us and asked us various questions.
Why do we want to adopt?
What gender and race are we willing to adopt?
What kind of discipline to we believe in?
What activities do we plan on doing with the child once they are old enough?
What school will the child attend?
Who will baby sit until the child is old enough to attend school?
She also asked us about how we met and our lifestyle as a couple.
What was the first thing that made us notice each other?
How do we resolve arguments?
Those types of questions
After the questions were done she did a brief walk through and we showed her where the baby's nursery will be and she viewed the backyard.
All in all is was pretty painless. She was at the house for about 2 hours and then we set up our one on one appointments with her.
ONE ON ONE APPOINTMENTS:
This is where our social worker met with us individually and simply asked us about our up bringing. Basically-what was our childhood like. How did our parent's discipline us. Where we went to school. What activities we were involved in etc.
After both of us went and had our one-on-one appointments she wrote up her report and her recommendations and submitted it to the commissioner for certification approval for the state of AZ. This is what we are waiting for. I have been told that it takes 4-6 weeks to get this back and I think we are at week 5 or 6 at this point so I am hoping it arrives soon. Our social worker assured us that she sees us having no problem being certified but still I want to have that paperwork so I can feel like I am one step closer to finally being a mom and having a baby.
I am so impatient. I want instant gratification and with the challenges we have faced trying to start our family I haven't gotten that of course. So now that we are on the adoption journey and of course I wish things would move a little faster than they are. But I am hanging in there and learning to be patient. We are doing everything we can on our end to make sure we are moving forward. At this point we just have to wait.
Wait for certification. Wait for our tax return so we have the money. Wait to get approval from our agency of our profile book so we can start making copies. Just wait. Waiting is the hardest part. I also know that once we are active with our agency and birth moms are viewing our profile we will have to wait some more. So I guess you could say I am learning a very valuable lesson in patience.
Here is what we had to do for the home study:
HOME STUDY
First, we had to be finger printed to make sure neither of us have criminal records. (which we don't' of course :) ) Then we had to fill out a huge packet full of info regarding our financial stability, our family members, their addresses, our daily routines, our employers etc. We also had to get medical clearance from our general Dr. stating that we were healthy enough to care for a child. Talk about feeling like you are being put under a microscope to see whether you are good enough to be a parent.
Once that was completed we had to ask 3 family members and 3 friends to write recommendations on our behalf. We had all of that turned in and were ready to go with the actual home visit when I lost my job due to being laid off in October. Talk about bad timing :( So everything had to be put on hold until January when I had a new job and was able to reschedule the visit.
THE HOUSE VISIT:
Our social worker came to the house and sat down with us and asked us various questions.
Why do we want to adopt?
What gender and race are we willing to adopt?
What kind of discipline to we believe in?
What activities do we plan on doing with the child once they are old enough?
What school will the child attend?
Who will baby sit until the child is old enough to attend school?
She also asked us about how we met and our lifestyle as a couple.
What was the first thing that made us notice each other?
How do we resolve arguments?
Those types of questions
After the questions were done she did a brief walk through and we showed her where the baby's nursery will be and she viewed the backyard.
All in all is was pretty painless. She was at the house for about 2 hours and then we set up our one on one appointments with her.
ONE ON ONE APPOINTMENTS:
This is where our social worker met with us individually and simply asked us about our up bringing. Basically-what was our childhood like. How did our parent's discipline us. Where we went to school. What activities we were involved in etc.
After both of us went and had our one-on-one appointments she wrote up her report and her recommendations and submitted it to the commissioner for certification approval for the state of AZ. This is what we are waiting for. I have been told that it takes 4-6 weeks to get this back and I think we are at week 5 or 6 at this point so I am hoping it arrives soon. Our social worker assured us that she sees us having no problem being certified but still I want to have that paperwork so I can feel like I am one step closer to finally being a mom and having a baby.
I am so impatient. I want instant gratification and with the challenges we have faced trying to start our family I haven't gotten that of course. So now that we are on the adoption journey and of course I wish things would move a little faster than they are. But I am hanging in there and learning to be patient. We are doing everything we can on our end to make sure we are moving forward. At this point we just have to wait.
Wait for certification. Wait for our tax return so we have the money. Wait to get approval from our agency of our profile book so we can start making copies. Just wait. Waiting is the hardest part. I also know that once we are active with our agency and birth moms are viewing our profile we will have to wait some more. So I guess you could say I am learning a very valuable lesson in patience.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Our Adoption Journey
OUR ADOPTION JOURNEY
Most of you are aware of our struggles to start our family. After 5 pregnancy losses we are now venturing into the world of adoption. We are very excited to be adopting and are hoping that through this blog we can share our experience and help others that may be thinking about going through the process themselves.
This is also a way to get the word out to everyone that if you do hear of any pregnant women out there who are considering adoption to please let us know. You can contact us through this blog or via email at lisa_weston@live.com. We will also have a toll free number set up soon which I will post on this page. Any help or leads anyone can give us would be greatly appreciated. Below is a little slide show we have included in our profile with the adoption agency we are using. Enjoy!
http://www.lifetimeadoption.com/
Our webpage with Lifetime Adoptions:
PLAYLIST
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